Blog Articles about Motivation
June 23, 2010
It isn’t all about the leader.
“Being aware of and celebrating differences and rewarding people for their contributions will go a long way to making sure that ensure that your team will be supportive even in a crisis.”
Read more about my views on the controversy over France’s national Football team in today’s Globe and Mail.
April 05, 2010
Commitment brings contentment. Commitment comes with the acceptance of imperfection.
In my last blog I celebrated the return of loyalty to work. According to Towers Watson people are becoming more interested in staying with one employer for life. If people are more committed to their employer, they will be happier at work.
How can you be happier if you are stuck with one employer?
You will be happier because you will no longer be searching for perfection. There are no perfect employers. Organizations are full of people and people can be difficult at times.
February 02, 2010
It isn’t you.
Some people just make you feel uncomfortable. Some people make almost everyone feel uncomfortable. These people thrive on chaos. You probably know some people like this—probably in senior roles. I have several clients like this. I used to worry about it. I don’t now. I recognize it is not about my ability to coach. It is about this person’s style.
Some people gain power, stay personally protected, and get results by knocking other people off balance in conversation. It is a habit they have honed and perfected over time. It is a habit that works for them.
The only way to deal with someone like this is to recognize it and then not let it bother you. Period. That’s all you can do.
How do you recognize it? Notice if you leave almost every interaction with this person feeling somehow inadequate yourself. Ask others if they have the same experience with this person. If the answer is “yes”, it isn’t you.
January 06, 2010
January Sucks. So Does September.
It’s official. No one really wants to go back to work in January.
I spend my days talking to people. I am a coach. That is what I get paid to do. A funny thing happens when you spend your days talking to people, you notice trends.
Here’s a trend that I can’t help but notice, January sucks. Everyone I talk to is in a funk. They are re-thinking their career. They feel unmotivated. They are pondering early retirement. Do you know what will happen by the end of the week? Most people will feel better and that will be fine. There is no big hidden issue, you don’t need to change your job – January sucks.
Do you know what else I’ve noticed? The exact same thing happens in September. It gets better too once you get back into the swing of things.
So what? Just remember that in January and September you will feel unmotivated and then go on to remember that you will also feel better.
September 16, 2009
K.I.S.S.
Keep it short _______. Yes I know the saying is “Keep it simple ________.” (I’ll let you fill in the blank - we try and avoid that word in our house).
This is a short simple blog about feedback. Keep all feedback short and simple. Don’t drone on. Don’t make excuses. Don’t try to discuss the underlying issues. Long conversations too often result in a lack of clarity for the person recieving the feedback.
Here’s an example of good K.I.S.S.feedback:
August 21, 2009
Leave your watch at home.
I was leaving for my annual three week vacation and Claire, an IMPACT coach, wished me a good holiday and asked rhetorically,
“I wonder if you will come back and be philosophical like you were last year?”
Well the answer is, “Yes.” I am sitting in the cottage feeling philosophical so I thought I would write about it.
May 25, 2009
The Sixty Percent Leader.
I was inspired to write this blog by a meeting with one particular client but I have to say that I had similar conversations with many people all week. Funny how lots of people seem to be thinking the same things at the same time.
This client was frustrated with the shortcomings of one of the leaders in his organization and spent a good part of the meeting complaining about the mistakes this leader had made. Rightly so, the leader is not perfect.
But who is perfect and why do we expect our leaders to be perfect? I'd like to suggest that there are two reasons for our high expectations. One, management literature has done a disservice to all of us in setting up standards around the "perfect leader". We all look for a leader who is inspirational and personally attractive to us. We look for a leader who knows what to do in every situation.
Two, there may be an answer rooted in psychology. We put leaders on pedestals and then are disappointed when they don't measure up. Sound like any teenagers you know? Sometimes when I listen to clients it reminds of Eric Bern and his theory of Transactional Analysis. He says we can analyze our transactions and determine if we are in either Parent-Child or Adult-Adult relationships with our peers. Our disappointment with leaders is much more closely aligned with Parent-Child than it is with Adult-Adult. An angry child might say to a parent "You let me down. You didn't give me what I wanted." An Adult relationship would look more like "Help me understand why you decided to implement this decision." Adult relationships according to Bern are relationships where both parties learn from one another.
There are probably other reasons for this "leader on a pedestal" phenomena. However, if you follow this blog, you'll know that the "why" for me is less important than the "what are you going to do about it?"
Here is what my client is going to do about it. Every time he feels frustrated with the inadequacies of leaders, he is going to think the following, "Sixty percent is good enough." Why did we pick sixty percent? It reminds us both that people (and leaders) are not perfect. Eighty percent seems too close to perfect. It also reminds us that leadership of a large group of people is complex and constantly changing. I work with a large number of very smart people. Not even a very smart person knows the right thing to do in every situation.
Sound like my standards aren't high enough? Maybe, but last time I checked leading an organization is very complex and no one, not even a leader, is perfect.
May 12, 2009
Give.
One of my clients sent the following comments to my most recent blog.
"Read your blog this morning about connecting with people – and I totally agree. I was at my networking meeting yesterday and we were discussing business development. One of our members brought a suggestion to the table, which I thought was so great. Instead of focusing your business development on selling yourself, focus it (particularly at this time given the tough economy) on helping others. Lending some free advice, listening to people’s issues and offering suggestions without any expectations of immediate work – I think this will pay off big in the long run."
I couldn't say it better myself. I am a big fan of free advice. Of course eventually you'll need to get paid but before you do, you should plan to be helpful. How else will people know if you are good? So, don't worry about what you are going to get from meetings. Think about what you can give. The more you give, the better you'll feel and the more your network will appreciate you and refer you to others. Nothing wrong with that.
May 07, 2009
The Best Coping Strategy. Bar None.
I am sitting on a conference call with a team of people. We are discussing dealing with stress. There are lots of ideas. Some people are exercising. Some have taken some time off. Some are diving into work. All of these ideas are good ones.
In my opinion, the single most effective coping strategy is to get out and connect personally with people. What do I mean by this? I mean calling people whom you like and yet haven't spoken to in a while. I mean getting out and meeting new people. I mean spending even more time with people you see often.
Why is this the best way to cope? Just being with people often makes you feel better. Talking to people about what is bothering you in a positive way can really help you work through change. Merely the act of talking releases stress. As you speak of what is bothering you, you feel that "thing" become smaller. In your head, it feels big. As you discuss it, it shrinks.
Talking to others also causes others to feel closer to you. When you open up about something that you care about it shows vulnerability and shows that you are "human". This causes people to feel more connected to you. It is human nature to want to be part of a community. As others feel more connected to you, you feel safer and more comfortable and so do they. That connection is exponential. So be honest and have enough courage to share what is really bothering you. Just do it in a professional way.
If you can't bring yourself to exercise, that's OK. At the very least, take someone for coffee or even better, take someone for a walk.
December 15, 2008
A Holiday Gift from IMPACT
What can we at IMPACT give you for the holidays? How about time and perspective? Wouldn't that be nice? IMPACT can't give you these things but we can help you get them.
